I am a person of extremes, someone who has never understood how to moderate any aspect of their being. Sometimes I struggle to keep my balance in the all-or-nothing aura I have created for myself. Once I believe I have reached the furthest positive or negative degree on my personal spectrum, I realize that there is always another boundary that can be pushed, and thus I am never satisfied.


This strange habit impacts most aspects of my life, with sex being no exception. When I first became sexually active, I would stick with the fundamentals, intimidated by anything that could be considered unconventional or taboo. It was not until I started to gently push myself out of my comfort zone that my need for immoderations started to influence my sex life as well.


With new experience came a growing appetite for fresh acts with people who were as curious as I was. As great as this all sounds, it had a few downsides. The simple pleasures that once stimulated me greatly have become basic and repetitive. My feelings have become very disconnected from the sex experience as a whole, and the constant desire for improvement has taken over the typical emotional aspects normally associated with it; sex really doesn’t come with any attachment for me. Ultimately, it has become very hard to obtain the regular sexual relationship that most acquire or have had at one point.


My sexual desensitization has put me in a state where I feel like I must work on myself. After some brainstorming, I came up with the idea for a sex cleanse. I genuinely believe that taking some time off from not only vaginal penetration but the whole range of sexual contact could be beneficial, lowering my intensity threshold for sexual acts; perhaps once reacquainted I will begin to enjoy its basic simplicities again.


Essentially, the hope is that I will no longer groan with agitation at the idea of foreplay, mixed in with four positions and 20 minutes of my time. Although there is nothing wrong with kinky sex, I would like to pace myself; I want to enjoy all aspects of sex and not just the extremes!


In order to go about this, I have to break my regular habit and implement moderation. My plan is to primarily abstain from vaginal penetration, and then slowly cut back from other sexual acts until I can withstand two months of little to no sexual contact.


For me, this may be the hardest indulgence to refrain from. Sex is all around us, and social media has made it painfully easy to engage with someone sexually at any place or time. This immediate interaction is the very last factor I have put on my list; once I can deny a phenomenal dick pic, I will be able to avoid most of my personal sex culture and go back to the basics … at least for a very limited amount of time.

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